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Post by Don on Oct 1, 2012 2:51:19 GMT -5
Hello Jeffrey and Michael,
I'm new here, so greeting to you both. I wanted to pose a question here, how do you achieve a healthy sense of self-esteem?
Don
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Post by jhananda on Oct 1, 2012 13:51:11 GMT -5
Hello Don, the premise that I rely upon is the only thing of value in this world is complete saturation in the sacred. Everything else is secondary. Now, what I have found by becoming completely saturated in the sacred is more wholesome psychology than I have ever enjoyed.
Now, how I got to complete saturation in the sacred was through leading a rigorous, self-aware, contemplative life, which just happens to be a full-time occupation.
So, if you want to achieve a healthy sense of self-esteem, then lose yourself in the sacred.
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Post by Michael Hawkins on Oct 2, 2012 10:47:39 GMT -5
Hello Don,
Along the lines of what Jeffrey suggests, I can say that my daily contemplative practice is all that remains standing once the chaos of life is cleared away. Relationships -- the mirroring that goes on between neurotic and psychotic individuals, tearing each other to pieces on a moment-to-moment basis -- are (in my opinion) at the root of our self-esteem issues. We may have the best of intentions with regard to our fellow humans, but there is so much woundedness inside each of us -- so much unfortunate history, which gets recycled and repeated in every encounter between us -- that we simply MUST find a way to disconnect from relational connections in order to process and let go of the distortions that assault us with such great frequency. A skillful, fruitful and rigorous contemplative practice (that leads to bliss, joy and ecstasy throughout each day and night) offers a healing refuge for our fractured psyches and emotional bodies. No matter what the circumstances of our lives happen to be, we owe it to ourselves to place this refuge at the center of our daily life....
Many blessings,
Michael
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Post by Michael Hawkins on Oct 2, 2012 10:54:05 GMT -5
P.S.
Self-esteem is dependent on external validation. The world pathologizes and marginalizes contemplative practice, and will do everything in its power to dissuade us from our practice. This is why it's so important for our practice to lead to self-arising bliss, joy and ecstasy -- because no one can take this away from us, and we can rely on it when, through unconscious fear and anxiety, everyone "out there" is trying to suck us back into the mire of their suffering. In establishing ourselves in our skillful, fruitful and rigorous contemplative practice, we need to acknowledge that external validation will most likely NOT HAPPEN -- and we need to push straight ahead with our practice regardless.
In a sense, invalidation is a tool for dismantling the ego structure that had previously trapped us in neurosis and psychosis, always seeking external satisfaction for cravings that can only be succored through inward realization. The answer is not OUT THERE; it is right here....
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